It is true that the most crushing blows can be those to your confidence and your motivation, when things go wrong and you feel like your progress has stopped or even slipped into reverse. Here are a few tips to help you work at your riding from the mental aspect, and help you through some of the more difficult experiences.
Be Honest and Sensible About Your Abilities, and What You Need to Work On
Never exaggerate your skill or your achievements, to yourself or to anyone else. Down play rather than over play your ability if riding with new companions or at a new stable. This is the best way to avoid possible embarrassment and potential harm to yourself or your mount, incidents that can really knock your progress. Be truthful about what you can do and what you need more help with, especially with instructors; this will help them support you where you need it most. If you don’t feel safe riding a certain horse, say so and unless your concerns are alleviated be strong enough to get off. A good rider knows he has limits, and most will have them throughout their riding careers. It is not a weakness, just good sense.
Approach Every Horse Like it Has Something to Teach You
Never regard riding a certain horse as a waste of your time. As long as you feel you are safe on that horse, the lazy or uncomfortable horse can be a real education. Are you nagging with your leg or do you need to use shorter, sharper aids? Is this uncomfortable horse leaning on the reins or dragging himself along - can you correct this? Feeling for and solving the issues with any horse can be a real challenge and bring great satisfaction if the horse improves as you ride it. Each horse has its own unique problems to present the rider, and solving as many different problems as possible under saddle really boosts your confidence and skill.
Rationalise Your Fears
If you fall off or have a similarly unhappy experience, avoid the destructive spiral of ‘I could have been seriously hurt, it could have been far worse, I can’t do it.” Don’t fall into the trap of the constant ‘What if’s”. Deal with what actually happened, not what could have happened. Think sensibly about how you could prevent it happening again, and talk to your instructor or more experienced friends about what could have avoided it. If the incident was a fluke be willing to accept that and understand just how unlikely it is to happen again. If you need to go back to basics, don’t misconstrue that as failure. Addressing and correcting any weaknesses is part of building yourself into a better rider all round.
If in Doubt, Blame Yourself for Errors and Seek to Remedy Your Mistakes
Although horses can occasionally let the rider down when it counts, in the vast majority of mishaps or miscommunications, the rider is at fault. If there is the slightest amount of uncertainty over what just went wrong, blame yourself and give the horse the benefit of the doubt. Were your signals unclear? Did you ask the impossible? Have you lost the horse’s confidence? Thinking this way and being strict with yourself means that you have a constant drive to improve, and develop in the most positive way. Blaming the horse whenever possible is a lazy rider’s approach and takes nothing beneficial from the incident.
Record Your Best Moments, and Relive Them When You Feel Down
With horses, there can be periods when nothing is going right. Keep a motivational diary, with descriptions of the lessons that went well, the shows that brought you the best results, or just the little things you thought would never go right, that did. Record everything you can about the day or the event, the place, the time, the weather, what horse you rode and how they felt. Try to include pictures, even if they are just of the place where it all happened, and taken by yourself after you rode. When things are going badly, go through your diary, picture these days, and remember what you can do when everything is going well; those times will come again.
Never Believe You Don’t Need More Instruction
The biggest mistake any rider can make is to believe he has achieved all he can and no longer needs advice from anyone. The best riders in the world benefit from eyes on the ground and support from instructors throughout their competitive careers. At each level of competency, riding is a constant struggle for that impossible perfection. Mistakes creep in very quickly without someone monitoring your riding. Have lessons as often as you can with an instructor appropriate for your experience.
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